What Your Olympic Allegiance Says About You – Pens Fan Edition

With so many Penguins going to the Olympics, it’s hard for a Pittsburgh fan to choose who to root for. The USA? Canada? Finland? Russia? If you haven’t already chosen, we here at The Pink Puck are here to help, with a comprehensive guide to where your allegiances should lie.

USA – You bleed red, white, and blue. Most specifically – blue, for the blue liners Brooks Orpik and Paul Martin, who are heading to Sochi to represent the US of A. You’re a fan of the defensive game, and you like your defensemen to be the solid, stay-at-home type. Reliable. Honest. Maybe the kind of guy who would cook you breakfast. (Thanks, Paul Martin.) Kris Letang is probably not your cup of tea.

Maybe you’re also a bit of a teacher’s pet, because you’ll also be rooting for Tony Granato and Dan Bylsma as USA coaches. You probably like the Penguin’s style of play and think that they’re a well-oiled machine with great special teams. But nothing beats the Penguins blue line for you.

Or maybe you’re just super-patriotic. What do I know?

Canada – O captain, my captain! Through rain, snow, wind, and hail, you will follow Sidney Crosby to the ends of the earth, or at least metaphorically over the 49th parallel. You like winning, and you like winning big – gold medal or bust for you. An intact Kunitz-Crosby-Dupuis line may reduce you to tears of joy at the sheer beauty. You probably tweeted #Kuni4Canada at least once, and you’re not even ashamed.

Finland – You’re kind of a hipster, to be honest. Finland’s the choice for those who like avoiding the beaten path, who want to root for a team with Penguins on it but not the obvious choices – so cliche. You like the underrated talents of Jussi Jokinen and the defensive dynamism of Olli Maatta. Gold would be great, but come on, everyone’s going for gold. You’ll just be happy to medal at all.

Russia – You’re an Evgeni Malkin fan – but not any Evgeni Malkin fan, the Evgeni Malkin fan. You are a bigger Evgeni Malkin fan than even I am. (Hah hah, not likely.) You are such a strong Evgeni Malkin fan that you’re willing to put aside every sketchy thing Russia has ever done – and they’ve done plenty – and root for the home team to take home the gold. Maybe you’re more than a little sketchy yourself. But mostly, you  just want Geno to achieve his hopes and dreams. You feel for that guy. And after all, Russia best.))))))